We Survived Another Grape Stomp

September 17

Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy. ~ Benjamin Franklin

When you’re in love it’s the most glorious two and a half days of your life. ~ Richard Lewis

An annual event every year (just checking to see if you caught the redundancy) in mid-September at Carlos Creek Winery during which the participants either swelter through a heat wave or wallow in the mud of the field parking lots. This year, everything was surprisingly fine. ~ Me

I am only human, although I regret it. ~ Mark Twain

Cleaning up with children around is like shoveling during a blizzard. ~ Margaret Culkin Banning

You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn’t that long ago we were swept away by the Macarena. ~ Jon Stewart

If you find it hard to laugh at yourself, I would be happy to do it for you. ~ Groucho Marx

[Saturday morning with Anthony Miltich. Gray skies that later gave way to yet another beautiful afternoon in Vacationland USA . . . ]

I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken. ~ H. Kyle Seale

[The Carlos Creek pickup truck is the backdrop for most group photos . . . ]

If you’re too open-minded; your brains will fall out. ~ Lawrence Ferlinghetti

[Here’s our main guy . . . ]

Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man – there’s your diamond in the rough. ~ Larry David

He knows nothing; he thinks he knows everything – that clearly points to a political career. ~ George Bernard Shaw

Confidence is 10% work and 90% delusion. ~ Tina Fey

[It’s always a fun time to practice your artwork, particularly since you have to empty the bottle first . . . ]

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine. ~ Caroline Rhea

I wish I were dumber so I could be more certain about my opinions. It looks fun. ~ Scott Adams

[Pretty much a one-eighty panorama shot . . . ]

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don’t need it. ~ Bob Hope

This is the worst thing to happen to beaches since the Speedo. ~ Bill Maher

[We have run into these folks before who were again kind enough to save a couple seats for us . . . ]

I’m trying to elevate small talk to medium talk. ~ Larry David

I’m not for everyone. I’m barely for me. ~ Marc Maron

[I estimated the afternoon crowd at about 2.35 million. While we had planned to stay with Anthony through his whole program anyway, we didn’t dare leave our seats because vultures were lurking everywhere . . . ]

Everyone has a purpose in life. Perhaps yours is watching television. ~ David Letterman

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers. ~ Matt Groening

[A good bullfighter knows how to avoid being gourd . . . ]

There is no such thing as fun for the whole family. ~ Jerry Seinfeld

Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money. ~ Jackie Mason

[After Anthony was finished, we serpentined through the crowds to the Grand Hall . . . ]

But the fact that some geniuses were laughed at does not imply that all who are laughed at are geniuses. They laughed at Columbus, they laughed at Fulton, they laughed at the Wright Brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown. ~ Carl Sagan

A bargain is something you don’t need at a price you can’t resist. ~ Franklin Jones

[We moved into the Grand Hall to catch a bit of Robb Justice and his band . . . ]

I did not climb to the top of the food chain to eat carrots. ~ Ron White

A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it’s written on. ~ Samuel Goldwyn

[In the way home, the view from the parking lot . . . ]

Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment. ~ Betty White

[Driving toward the exit . . . ]

All the things I really like to do are either immoral, illegal or fattening. ~ Alexander Woollcott

I live by my own rules (reviewed, revised, and approved by my wife)… but still my own. ~ Si Robertson

[The Super bought a 7′-long Norwegian vimple at the Stomp and, throwing caution to wind, used it as a replacement for her Peace flag . . . ]

I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering. ~ Steven Wright

Long may she wave . . . ~ Me

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that! ~ Tom Lehrer

I am an early bird and a night owl… so I am wise and I have worms. ~ Michael Scott

Up Next: More excitement than I can stand . . .